'I Went with My Heart'

Last time on reality pop cherubs ,  Liam showed his chiseled abs , Louis got stung but smiled bravely through his trauma , Harry announced that he would do nude scenes if the part demanded it , and through it all Sinitta now crowned Queen Nefertiti dozed off . Now its verdict time would The Dark Lord  unleash reality  pop hell on our reality pop cherubs  ? or would their sheer talent and marketability get them through !

As the boys took the endless walk back to the court yard , stepping over Sinitta who by now had fallen off her throne and on to the floor . Harry reflected on just what all this meant to them .  ''If you get a ' no ' then you go straight back to doing stuff that kind of drives  you to get here  in the first place ''. Harry , Roland Barthes himself , couldn't have explained the bands predicament any better.

The endless walk to the court of the Dark Lord and Queen Nefertiti begins 

No Pressure !

Yes there's Louis at the back , grinning away without a care in the world 

As the boys walked on , with their cherub like faces full of both fear and trepidation  ( well nearly everyone .) Meanwhile across the globe in Australia , at the court of Danni Minogue , who appeared to be broadcasting from the middle of the jungle , dispatched Tom a keen body builder and singer , why only on the  previous show Danni had said  how cute he was and  Tom 'had got something' - great pecs ?

 .

Tom - Muscles !

Back at 'Paradise Island' the boys long walk continued as Dark Lord Cowell of the Sith booted off 'Hustle' for thrashing his mansion  on their first night . 'Princes and Rouges' for their  inspired choregraphy and covering the Buggles classic hit 'Who killed the record industry ?' . Finally even 'Diva Fever's' , disco globe exploded and off they went . 

Hustle - Necking all of Lord Cowell's imported Japanese beer did the girls no favours 

Bad dancing and A Bad Cover , their fate was sealed 

 Dark decisions - Diva Fever were they booted off as they could have been actually entertaining ?

The Tension was palpable as Zane gazed mysteriously on , Harry's grip tightened around rosy cheeked Nialls waist , it was almost as if he new what was coming .

Top Gun !

With all of the boys potential opponents vanquished Lord Cowells darkness lifted and in its place emerged a kindly Sugar Daddy. Uncle smiling almost benevolently , Lord Cowell spoke of his gamble ( lets see now ,  both Liam and Niall sing already and  have established Facebook followings , Louis has already performed in school musicals and Harry as we know was in the legendary White Eskimos and Zain well is Zain finally lets not forget  Justin Bieber is doing rather well , the choice was a difficult one indeed ) Cue dramatic pause ' Guys'... and knowing full well that Judge Louis would dearly love to be sitting in his place ...''I've gone with my heart your through ''. But the Lord taketh as well as giveth and added ' you will all receive a  full makeover , date to be decided at my convenience'

The Pop Reality Cherubs thanked their kindly Uncle Simon

'Oh Uncle Simon'

Their then followed such celebrations the likes of which have not seen since the end of Return Of the Jedi when the Ewoks layed down a beat that only a mother Ewok could love . As one after the other the cherubs embraced their kindly benefactor  with Louis moving in for the kill . I can only imagine at this point back in Ireland Judge Louis changed channels , but as we all know fame costs and this is where you start paying , with yet another stunning no expenses spared X factor makeover !